Pastor Adeboye use some of these tactics in the classic $1 billion Video. These 19 psychologically damaging, manipulative traits are used daily in the churches to suppress people and collect money. Pastor Adeboye and Chris Oyakhilome are experts at this.
1. Guilt trip:
A special kind of intimidation tactic. A manipulator suggests to the conscientious victim that they do not care enough, are too selfish or have it easy. This usually results in the victim feeling bad, keeping them in a self-doubting, anxious and submissive position. Pastor Adeboye telling his people not to shame him before God. Meaning, if they don’t give him the money they will be shaming him before God. Who would like to put Daddy Adeboye to shame before God? Nobody.
2.Lying by omission:
This is a very subtle form of lying by withholding a significant amount of the truth. This technique is also used in propaganda. – Pastor Adeboye and Chris Oyakhilome use this technique a lot. For example, Pastor Adeboye said God built the first auditorium, but now he wants the people to build the next one. But he forgot to tell the people that God doesn’t have a currency printing press or a bit coin miner.
Manipulator comforts the victim into submission by claiming (whether true or false) that many people already have done something, and the victim should as well. These include phrases such as “Many people like you …” or “Everyone does this anyways.” Such manipulation can be seen in peer pressure situations, often occurring in scenarios where the manipulator attempts to influence the victim into trying drugs or other substances. In Pastor Adeboye’s case, if the top ten come forward with N1 billion each and the top 100 come forward with 100 million each then who are you not to come forward.
Manipulator refuses to admit that they have done something wrong. Basically, these pastors and all those following them refused to admit wrongdoing because in Nigeria everything goes. But they forgot Jesus is not a Nigerian.
An excuse made by the manipulator for inappropriate behaviour. Rationalization is closely related to spin. Like someone told me, what is one billion naira? That is a chicken change where Pastor Adoboye is. Yet another gentleman said, someone built a church for N billion and donated it to a church. Even the video is an old video of 4 years ago.
This is a type of denial coupled with rationalization. The manipulator asserts that their behaviour is not as harmful or irresponsible as someone else was suggesting, for example, saying that a taunt or insult was only a joke.
While Pastor Adeboye and the other Mega churches are collecting trillions from people, they are putting 10% of that money back to the community and people are hailing them. Meanwhile, they are collecting 90% into their private pocket. In the bible law on tithing they often refers to, it was the other way around. They also forgot to mention that tithe was never money but food items.
7.Selective inattention or selective attention:
Manipulator refuses to pay attention to anything that may distract from their agenda, saying things like “I don’t want to hear it”. These Pastors don’t like to tackle social issues, don’t get involved with problems of even their followers. They say they are not charity.
Manipulator not giving a straight answer to a straight question and instead being diversionary, steering the conversation onto another topic.
Similar to diversion but giving irrelevant, rambling, vague responses, weasel words.
Manipulator throwing the victim onto the defensive by using veiled (subtle, indirect or implied) threats.
Manipulator uses sarcasm and put-downs to increase fear and self-doubt in the victim. Manipulators use this tactic to make others feel unworthy and therefore defer to them. Shaming tactics can be very subtle such as a fierce look or glance, unpleasant tone of voice, rhetorical comments, subtle sarcasm. Manipulators can make one feel ashamed for even daring to challenge them. It is an effective way to foster a sense of inadequacy in the victim. Pastors Adeboye, inviting top 10 people who can bring a billion to come to his office. Differentiating them from those that can only afford N100,000,000. Basically, he was using coercion and telling the rest they are not worthy to see him.
12.Vilifying the victim:
More than any other, this tactic is a powerful means of putting the victim on the defensive while simultaneously masking the aggressive intent of the manipulator, while the i7 falsely accuses the victim as being an abuser in response when the victim stands up for or defends themselves or their position. It is Aroms and Sunday Adelaja that are the antichrist for pointing this out.
13.Playing the victim role:
Manipulators portrays themselves as a victim of circumstance or of someone else’s behaviour in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation. – They will tell you that People like Aroms and Sunday Adelaja are trying to destroy the church. So, you must feel sorry for the pastors and the church and defend the Lord, as if the Lord cannot defend himself. They forgot the Lord said vengeance is mine.
14.Playing the servant role:
Cloaking a self-serving agenda in guise of a service to a more noble cause, for example saying they are acting in a certain way to be “obedient” to or in “service” to an authority figure like GOD.
15.Seduction: Manipulator uses charm, praise, flattery or overtly supporting others to get them to lower their defences and give their trust and loyalty to the manipulator. They will also offer help with the intent to gain trust and access to an unsuspecting victim they have charmed. Telling people, they will be blessed by God if they just do certain things first for the Lord. People always must do something first for the lords. Their lord is so self-centred that he never does anything first for a child until you beg and beg, cry and fast.
16.Projecting the blame (blaming others):
Manipulator scapegoats in often subtle, hard-to-detect ways. Often, the manipulator will project their own thinking onto the victim, making the victim look like they have done something wrong. Manipulators will also claim that the victim is the one who is at fault for believing lies that they were conned into believing, as if the victim forced the manipulator to be deceitful. All blame, except for the part that is used by the manipulator to accept false guilt, is done to make the victim feel guilty about making healthy choices, correct thinking and good behaviours.
It is frequently used as a means of psychological and emotional manipulation and control. Manipulators lie about lying, only to re-manipulate the original, less believable story into a “more acceptable” truth that the victim will believe. Projecting lies as being the truth is another common method of control and manipulation. Manipulators love to falsely accuse the victim as “deserving to be treated that way.” They often claim that the victim is crazy and/or abusive, especially when there is evidence against the manipulator.
Manipulator tries to suggest that any harm done was unintentional or that they did not do something that they were accused of. Manipulator may put on a look of surprise or indignation. This tactic makes the victim question their own judgment and possibly their own sanity.
Manipulator tries to play dumb by pretending they do not know what the victim is talking about or is confused about an important issue brought to their attention. The manipulator intentionally confuses the victim for the victim to doubt their own accuracy of perception, often pointing out key elements that the manipulator intentionally included in case there is room for doubt. Sometimes manipulators will have used cohorts in advance to help back up their story.
Manipulator uses anger to brandish sufficient emotional intensity and rage to shock the victim into submission. The manipulator is not actually angry, they just put on an act. They just want what they want and get “angry” when denied. Controlled anger is often used as a manipulation tactic to avoid confrontation, avoid telling the truth or to further hide intent. They will say God will destroy those challenging the man of god. Fire and thunder will come from heaven and destroy Aroms and Sunday Adelaja. Etc.