You will agree with me that getting ‘friendzoned’ is the most painful thing when it comes to male-female social dynamics. The funny thing is, most guys don’t even know when they are in the friendzone. But What does it mean to get friendzoned?
In literal terms, to get friendzoned by a girl is to be considered as just a friend, with no hope of intimacy; or to be considered as a big brother, the one who provides her basic needs and gives her advice.
Once you are in the dark abyss of friendzone, your chances of ever seeing the light of day is slim. It’s even better for you to be dumped as a boyfriend ( yea, guys do get dumped too!) than for you to be lost in the friendzone with no hope of rescue. This article aims to bring to the foreground of your mind the three basic reasons why girls always see you as a big brother; or to put it more succinctly, a ‘MAGA’.
1. You Are Mr. Too-Nice.
Are you like Emeka when it comes to dating? You are very nice. In fact, you get compliments from girls about how nice you are nice to a fault. But sadly, this is reality – not Hollywood, where the nice, shy, and feeble-minded protagonist finishes first.
Not to sound misogynistic or crude, giving favours to girls who dont deserve it will only backfire in the long run. It will not only kill your game; it will also make you look cheap.
DON’T BE LIKE EMEKA!!!
Before you can start playing nice to a girl, and saying yes to her to her requests, you need a certain level of investment from her-which brings us to the next point.
2, You Are More Invested Than She Is.
Everything you do to make a relationship or social interaction move forward is termed “Investment”. You sow a seed of investment when you do any of the following: call her, text her, send cash, start chats, and so on. When you do these things too much, you become predictable, like Kunle. You need to give your target an opportunity to miss you, so she can replay your investments. Giving her too much attention will never achieve that. And dont forget, sex is the greatest investment.
The person who invests more is the one who is more attracted, and sadly, the one who feels more pain after a breakup. Conversely, the person who invests less is the one who does less work, and the one who controls the convo.
Rita never felt anything for Kunle. He was too obsequious and predictable. He gave her too much attention. She only kept him around because of his magnanimity.
DON’T BE LIKE KUNLE
3.You Don’t Act Like A Boyfriend Material
When you dont show the tendencies of being a boyfriend, girls will automatically friendzone you- I dont care whether you look like Brad Pitt. If you are cool and well groomed, you dont need permission to do somethings. You dont have to be good looking, just be looking good.
Can you call her nicknames like Sexy, Baby, Boo, BabyPie without fear? Without thinking or caring about what she would think? When you meet her, do you go for hugs or handshake? Side hugs or face-face hugs?
You can get easily friendzoned, just like Richard, when you dont act like a boyfriend from the outset. Think about it. You don’t need permission to date or attract a girl. Nothing concerns you with her boyfriend or past relationships. Your only care, from the first few minutes of approach, is to act like a boyfriend.
You want her to be your girl, right? Have you ever asked yourself: “Am I acting like a boyfriend?” or “Do I have the qualities of a boyfriend?
Moreover, when you keep begging a girl to date you, asking her out without end- even after she has told you a blatant no already- you risk total rejection. Beautiful girls don’t fancy desperate guys. If you are the desperate type, you are already on the steep highway leading to friendzone.
Play your own game and keep the attraction button pressed. With enough attraction and acting like a boyfriend from day one, she may open up about her boyfriend and she might not. If she does, no worries, just continue your game. Dont back out. If she doesn’t bring her relationship status up, good for you. In any case, you must keep advancing like a soldier on a mission.
Some girls might want to have fun with you, but you asking: ” Do you have a boyfriend”, automatically kills all the attraction. You begin to make her rationalize her attraction for you, and she might even end up telling you a yes- even if she doesnt have a boyfriend.
Play your game tight.
DONT BE LIKE RICHARD!
The process of getting locked in the friendzone is not rocket science. Women dont friendzone you without legit reasons. You must have either been too nice and invested too much, or failed to show you have boyfriend potential. Correct these three mistakes, and you will be amazed at how many girlfriends you will have to deal with. grin
Till we meet again. I remain xxxteddyxxx.
Written by XXXteddyXXX aka Kelvin AsapTeddy